Right off the bat I’m going to say that there is no right or wrong answer to this. Every couple is different and prioritise different things. With that said, here are my thoughts on this topic.
The average engagement in England is 20 months. I’m always surprised when I hear this number as I always consider it to be significantly higher! When I speak to couples at wedding fairs they talk about how they aren’t getting married for another 2 or 3 years. Some of them haven’t even got a date yet but considering 4+ years away!
Personally, I think that, just because you’re engaged doesn’t mean you have to married quickly after. It very much depends on your situation.
Perhaps you have the idea of your dream wedding and it doesn’t come cheap. If that’s the case, have a long engagement. Use the time to save the money up to have your dream wedding. There is no harm in doing that. Everyone will totally understand. The temptation is to get sucked in by all your friends when they start talking about the plans and offering their advice. Just be safe in the knowledge that it will all be worth it in the end!
If you have no idea what you want your wedding to look like, this is a great reason to extend the engagement out to give you time to craft the perfect wedding. You can get the day you never knew you dreamt of!
If the most important thing to you is marrying your fiancé and a big fancy wedding isn’t important to you then I wouldn’t worry about it at all! You can get married as quickly as you like!
However, I think these days, the majority of people like the idea of a big wedding with all their friends and family to enjoy their love for each other.
Something like that takes time to plan. You really want to make sure you get the chance to show off your personality and why you love each other. That’s not a overnight thing.
I think that if you get married quickly you can easily end up with a more generic wedding day or a day that can look like it’s been rushed. Neither of which is a great look for a wedding!
With all the pressure to get engaged and married these days, you need to block out the noise. Everyone will be pressuring you to do it quickly, or do it the way they like, regardless, you need to do what you are comfortable with.
Just because 3 of your best friends got engaged and married in 18 months doesn’t mean you have to too.
Did you even enjoy their weddings? If not, why not? Was it because they hadn’t thought of everything? See, there are benefits to have a longer engagement and making sure you get what you want out of your wedding day.
Until next week,